It was always said that one is the loneliest number. I am learning that depending on the scenario that not only is not true but it can be an awesome thing. I am learning that doing things by myself, with myself, for myself are just what the doctor ordered. I have for way too long not tapped into the power of one. My power, the power of Drea. What a sad realization that I have for too long put things first that didn’t necessarily need to be. Don’t get me wrong, raising my daughter and working on my marriage were important but now, it’s my time. I’m not talking about pretending to be single or living in that way but enjoying spending time away by myself. For instance, as I pen this post I am sitting alone in a hotel room. Just me, for me, by myself. I slept the best sleep last night than I have in many YEARS that did not involve wine. That’s major shit right there.
No snoring in my face. That alone is key. House noises are customary but can be annoying. So last night with the sounds of smooth jazz playing I took a snooze about 7. Then finally turned off the lights and tucked in for the night. Boy, what a time. It was grand. Woke up refreshed and ready for the day. Which largely involves me sitting at this desk or on the couch writing blogs, or reading a book. Maybe some coloring. A nap is definitely going to happen again. Just being present with MYSELF in this moment is huge. Now, it’s not like I’ve never been alone. I have my weekends at home where the man is at work and the girl (who is moving soon – praise be to the Lord in heaven) is out and about but the difference is – it’s at home. There is always something to do at home. Those of of that suffer from some form of “I can’t sit my ass still-itis cause there is always something to do” know what I mean. You sit to read, then your mind starts with “you know there is that load of laundry that you could wash”, or there is at least a fork and a glass in the sink you could wash those”, which then turns into a full kitchen clean. Things that don’t even require being done but you find yourself off the task of doing what you wanted to do because that’s what you do. Maybe it’s just me. I can own that. Hence why I am here.
I am okay with admitting that I need to be in a distraction free zone to get some things done. It’s okay. I recognize that sometimes its more about you have to separate yourself from the familiar to reset your focus. Not losing focus is key to success. No matter what your version of success is do not lose focus. Don’t let anyone steal your shine either. We all have naysayers that are quick to say no you can’t or why are you doing that or why wasn’t I invited. In the words of one Dr. Erica D. Gamble, PhD. “You can not dance every dance”. I got the tee shirt for that one (I made it but no matter). Everyone is not invited and should not be invited on your journey for self improvement, self awareness and your overall greatness. There are just some trips you must take alone, mental, spiritual or psychological. Be it a religious quest, one that involves the help of talk therapy, meds or yoga. Hell there are just some things you must do alone. Be okay with that. Again, cause here I sit. Spending money on a hotel room to sit in alone. Music, books, pastries (Holtman’s doughnuts in my kryptonite), snacks and wine. When I purchased this Ipad it was for the purpose of being able to be mobile and write (so I said) and yes it is so. Do you, be great, be alone with yourself. It’s okay because you were born alone and will thusly die that way. Live your best life ever and enjoy your own company. The power of one – Me. I am…all of that.
My life is a whole comedy of errors. I am funny, emotional, passionate, and real. I am as real of a friend as ever was. I am creative, I love to read, bake and laugh.
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