…Enough (Untidy Soul An album by Samm Henshaw)

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Just when you think all hope is lost, BOOM, there is a glimmer of light, and that’s all you need. I hadn’t written in a while, and that was okay but I felt like I should. Then, you need a title or something worthy of the time spent to create it.

Then as many things happen in my life, this song appeared…the lyrics and the beat did the rest.

Enough

[Verse 1]
All these questions on my mind
Like I’m never satisfied
But get all I need
More than I need to get by
It’s getting heavy on my brain
Too busy trying to make a name
It’s like, when get some
The more I want, the love fades

[Pre-Chorus]
Why I always gotta be perfect?
Sometimes, I go, try to make everything so perfect
But it’s not
And it’s cool
‘Cause it’s real
When it’s true

So, I let this marinate in my spirit, and as it happens it soothes those places that needed just a little bit of further confirmation that we are on the right track and it’s okay.

Back story, I have been doing a study and part of that included releasing some strong holds in my life. Who knew that there could be so many things that held us in a pattern or state of fear, unworthiness, shame, guilt and the list goes on. In my struggles to move past the past, it was apparent that it was time to drop some things off in the dump of forever gone away. That wasn’t a short drive nor easy task for you see, I had become way to comfortable living in the crazy that was holding me semi hostage. On this quest to live my best life this prior step was necessary to come out of “that” place. Next step comes with this very question…Am I enough? Have I done enough? Will it be enough? Insert scream of anguish!!!!

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While cowering in a corner before I came out swinging, those questions loomed overhead and kept me in “that” place. Now, with my chest out and my head held high the answer is a resounding HELL YEAH I AM. I always have been. I have always known that, I just didn’t act on it and for that I owe myself one thousand apologies.

Being enough? What exactly does that even mean? The definition of enough is in or to a degree or quantity that satisfies or that is sufficient or necessary for satisfaction. Now, looking at this definition how could we not be enough? Well that’s easy? People can be greedy and no matter what you do, what you give, how well or how much…it will never satisfy them. That my friends is not your issue. It is solely theirs. We are enough just the way God made us. I don’t need anyone to approve of who I am.

Enough of the doubt and wondering what I could have done different. I mean we all have come up short on what we should have done in a situation but that doesn’t mean we aren’t or weren’t enough of anything. We didn’t try hard enough, or didn’t put in enough effort, maybe we tapped out and didn’t care anymore. That doesn’t mean I am not enough, some things and people aren’t worth the effort, and that is simply what it is.

You will never be enough for the wrong person. Accept it and move on. That’s it.